Speak

This is an excerpt of my August 8, 2018 journal. I was trying to meditate, but the Guys wanted to chat. I’d forgotten about this conversation until my computer glitched and stopped on the entry. Uh huh. No coincidences.

Reading it now, two-and-a-half years later, has left me shocked and in awe. I hope whomever needs this (I couldn’t focus – or sleep! – until I got this dang blog published), is as amazed as I am.


Dear One. All is not as it seems. Do not give up hope.

WTF?! Give up hope? On what?

See the light that is before you and do not concentrate upon anything else. Follow that light. Watch where it goes. It will not mislead you and neither will we. You have a job to do, an important purpose. You will not fail. “Failure” isn’t even in your vocabulary. You ask so many questions, and rightly so. You know where you are headed, but you must give it time. All will be revealed in perfect harmony and not a second before.

(EFFERS!)

You will see how beautifully everything is working out. It is as it should be. Now, we wish to hear your questions and we wish to answer them.

Okay. Ceta. How can I help her and how can she help me? She is most pleasing, that one. She delights in helping others; that is one of her biggest gifts. Sometimes she will frustrate but please know she is HELPING at the same time. Release your reservations, little one, for that is what is holding you back.

My “reservations?” Hummm… I’ll have to think about that.

We will help you. You are still, in some ways, largely stuck on the past. You are making firm ground to get out, but you are not there yet. She is not you and you are not her. She will not repeat the mistakes you made nor will she want too. She has a separate life to lead and it will serve her best not to take on your troubles or problems for they are yours and yours only.

Okay. Yeah, that makes sense. Thank you. We are most pleased to help you. Well, I’m most pleased you ARE helping me. Love you Guys!

What is the next question you wish to address, little one?

My work. What about it?

I feel a change coming and I know I’m moving on. I’m not sure if I will be doing Reiki (Yes, you will). Will I change offices? Yes…and soon. You are no longer a good fit for where you are. You have outgrown it as you knew you would. We will guide you; we will make it easy. No upsets or bumps in the night. The transition will be smooth.

Thank you…but will I still do Reiki? Choosingly. Selectively. You are no longer meant for the masses; you are meant to specialize. This will bring you a new awareness. You have been building this and are at the pinnacle of your performance.  Others will find you, when it is right, and you will know your True Calling.

Fucking cool, Guys. 

We do not like it when you use profanity

Well, lump it as this is who I am.

We will try to abide by these rules. 

I love you Guys so much. I really do.


What is your next question, little one?

My books. What of them? They will be brilliant, as you are. They will shine with your light, your love, and your conviction. You will not be disappointed nor will others. You will write a trilogy; we have seen it on High. You are powerful little one, but your words transcend boundaries. They soar to the heavens and back for all to hear.

Okay, stahhhp. Is this my ego talking?! You should know never to doubt us; you are a clear and clairvoyant channel. You are pure. Plain and simple. You are pure. Nothing about you is anything less. You are complete and pure. There are not too many of your ilk and that is why you demand perfection from yourself and others

We watch out for you day and night. We watch you with cat-like lenses. You are perfect and charmed and you think about your decisions. You are not willy nilly. You are careful and planned. We respect that. You do not go off “halfcocked,” you go fully cocked. 

Hahaha! Omg. LOL’ing!!!

We love you, little one. You are a delight and a pure ray of light. You will succeed with whatever you touch. All you have to do is but ask and we will be at your side in a moment’s delight. Always. Forever. Eternal. We tell you again, you will not fail.

I didn’t realize I was having anxiety about failing… You do. You ALL do. It is normal and right. It makes you stronger and leaner.

We wish to talk with you about a few things now. Ready?

Uhhh…. Sure.

You are powerful. It’s time you own it. We have watched you pansy that and we assure you, YOU ARE POWERFUL. Why do you discredit or disclaim that?

I don’t want it to appear that I have a big ego or that I’m not humble. Does that suit you? Well, does it? We do not think so. 

Well, what am I supposed to do? Shine! Simply shine

WTF does that mean?  Do your Work and leave the rest to us. 

Isn’t that what I’ve been doing?  No. You’ve been holding back out of fear. 

Fear? Fear of what? Fear of Betrayal

Omg. What? Fear of Betrayal

No. I heard you, I just don’t even understand. You do. We see it in your eyes

Fear of Betrayal. Ok, I’ll need to sit with that. You can let it go if you want. It no longer serves you. You have outgrown it. You can keep it, if you like, but it does not serve you anymore. Kind of like the perms of the 80s. 

WHAT!? OMG! Who ARE you Guys?! A sense of humor and not liking when I swear?  New boys, maybe? We are neither boy nor girl. We are everything. We are the mountains and the streams. We are the air and the surface. We are everything in between. We know everything; see everything and care for everything, unlike some of you humans who have complete disregard for what is given to you.

Am I one of those? No. Never. You are very thankful – Miss Manners, as you call yourself.  You have a good heart, one that gives and takes. It is bountiful.

We are almost finished and then will address your needs. Focus on how far you’ve come, not how far you have to go. That is ancient history.

What? Focusing on how far I have to GO is history?! Yes. Repeatedly. History. We see we have blown your mind. We will tell you more for you are worthy and ready. There will be a son born of this union.

Ohhh, just what the shit. I’m post-menopausal and Trinity is fixed.

Watch for it. It will not be of flesh and blood, but it will be an offspring none the less. You will know. When the time is right, you will know

Could you be more cryptic? We aren’t being cryptic at all. You will see. There will be a son born of this union. 

Uhhh…okay.  I trust the shit out of you Guys, but right now I think you are daft. 

(Silence)


What do I need to know about this book (One Plus One Makes Three)? Get out of your own way, little one. In our world your book is already published and you’re working on the “transition.”

Transition? Yes, your next book. It will be a transition to a different life. One you will enjoy even more. One that allows you more freedom to travel and to stay put. One that allows you luxuries you’ve not allowed yourself to dream of. You have made a fabulous world for yourself. Do not fuck it up.

Okay. Now I KNOW I’m making this up because you strait-laced angels NEVER swear. We tell you; we are a new breed. A hierarchy if you will. We are hybrids and have some of the traits you humans possess and some that you don’t

What should I call you? The same as before. We will answer to anything.

Do I need a literary agent? It is not necessary, little one. We will be your agent. Your Agent of God. Your book will find its way into the “right hands” as your Other (Trinity) has said. We have seen to it. Just write it; finish it, put it to bed and let us take it from there. We are your new managers now. We are stubborn and tenacious, and I think you will like what we have done for you. 

Done? Oh yes. Everything is already done. You just need to visualize it in order for it to come true. You do not need a publisher for it is already published

Ummm… dudes? Forgive me, but I think that’s pie in the sky. How are you going to publish it? Someone will come to you. Seek you. They carry the light you seek.

So Shanda isn’t the publisher for me? She may be. Hold off for now. We will see what we can do to hurry the process along. Have faith. Trust. You do not need an agent. We are your agent.

I’m thinking you’re full of shit. You’re gonna send me a publisher like before Monday? This wasn’t what I was expecting. I wanted to pull the trigger and go with Shanda. You certainly can but we are trying to save you money. You are gifted and talented and there are people out there who would die to work with you. They will fight tooth and nail to get your business.  Maybe not with book One, but by book Two, you will be a hot item, entity. We promise (assure) you this.

So…now what? Just do your thing, little one. And trust. We do, and so shall you.


My husband. Tell me something about him. What we have to tell you may frighten you but do not let it. He is going through an upgrade and everything he thought he knew is gone. Everything he thought was right is no longer there. He is having to recreate new worlds and roads as the others have disappeared. Poof! Just like that. He will transition smoothly and easily. He is well prepared. Do not let him fluster you and do not let him worry you. He is fine and he will be fine. He may have some ups and downs, but don’t you all?

Yep. 

He has found a great peace inside him that he didn’t know existed. Every now and then it rumbles and threatens to upheave, but he holds it down and each time it happens, the fear response becomes less and less. He is learning. Finally, he is learning. He has taken a liking to it, too. He is beautiful in all that he is trying to overcome. He loves you. You must never forget that. He loves you most of all and more than his love for anything else. 

He long ago saw your light and he sought to capture it (I’m shown a lasso being thrown around a comet’s tail). He didn’t want to harness you, but to ride along with you.  You burn bright, little one, and he saw it first.

Anything else? Yes. Give him space. Give him time. Do not demand change, allow him to get there on his own. You have your own fish to fry

Omg. You didn’t just say that!  We did. You have our ear, what else is it that you wish to communicate?

I love you Guys. Thank you. We love you too. However, what we feel for you transcends love. You will see someday.

Hey! Did I really experience a little bit of heaven last week with the deceased fiancé? You did. And you will experience more. You will only go higher, little one (charge more!). Demand more of yourself and others and they will not let you down. You are destined for Greatness

How? How not? In every way. You will see. You will light up the heavens for all to see.

OMG. That’s in a meditation I do for Reiki students!

It is? We did not know (sly smile).